While the concept of coming of age is an inherently personal concept, much of our life is defined by our relationship with others. Therefore, I believe our social interactions can do a lot to display this process.
The first aspect of coming of age that often comes up in discussion is memory. We said in class that we do not see ourselves as coming of age at a certain time, but rather we view our coa process through a collection of memories. I have noticed that sharing memories with others whether they were there or not is very powerful for building one’s self image. Additionally, a meaningful way to view one’s past is through the context of friends and experiences with those around you. Lastly, the another defining characteristic of coa is maturity, and this is most clearly expressed through relationships with others. These evolve over time from playful or submissive (to parents) to professional or romantic. This process is crucial to coa and requires others to be intimately involved in one’s development
Are there any other ways your coa is represented or shared with others? Or do you think this is a purely individual journey?
I think that another very important aspect of coa and identity is the construction of goals and ideals. This process can be catalyzed by personal fictional/reflectional writing, when there is freedom to experiment with different realities, personalities, and choices.
ReplyDeleteThis isn't quite as direct as the ideas you mentioned, but I think it can be as important.
DeleteYeah this is a very good point. The concept of long term goals is a mature one. Personal Ideals also do a lot to define you so that also makes sense as a coming of age element. I think both of these things are iterative as well. I am starting to notice that a lot is going into this whole journey of coming of age.
DeleteI definitely think that coming of age is both a personal occurrence and a shared one. You might be acquainted with the saying, "It takes a whole village to raise a child." Although this can be interpreted in many ways, I would personally apply it to the coming of age process. Those around you, both parents and friends alike, shape and influence the decisions that you will make in your life. We see this in Portrait of the Artist with Stephen. Although we are reading the novel through free indirect discourse and Stephen's thoughts, the fellows, his parents, and his religion all contribute to how Stephen sees himself and how he seems to be maturing. However, ultimately the way Stephen decides to portray himself is on him and the coming of age process becomes very personal and individual.
ReplyDeleteI definitely don't think that your coa process is purely an individual journey. For me, I loosely define coa as a changing in thinking (for you to mature, but really what does it mean to mature?) The way you think is shaped in part by your experiences and influences from the people around you. Maybe you never realized you had such strong opinions about stalks of corn until someone challenges you. From that heated debate, you may establish some thoughts that may lead to others. You can also find inspiration within yourself too. However, I find that I can only after I had an encounter with someone that propelled a change of thought.
ReplyDeleteI agree with what's been said in that, although you will, at some time, have a personal coa moment, the time it occurs/ develops depends on the people around you. I think we base how we develop both off our past selves and off of others. So it would be hard to truly coa if you have no one compare too.
ReplyDeleteIt can definitely be a shared experience. It's very common to see people sharing their newly acquired driver's licenses on Facebook, and probably even more so drinking together on 21st birthday. As a result of these communal events, I think coming of age can be a more of a "single point" kind of thing than many believe. I've heard plenty of stories about 21st shenanigans and even more through television, just showing how memorable it can be.
ReplyDeleteI think this question can be compared to the nature vs. nurture argument. Everyone has different opinions and it's hard to know for sure what's right and what's wrong-- or there aren't really rights and wrongs. It really has to be a combination of both. You can't fully become who you're meant to be without the influence of those around you, because you kind of judge yourself in terms of other people. And, while people do have their own original thoughts and ideas, some things have to come from others-- even if they are as basic as learning how to talk. At the same time, part of growing up is figuring out who you want to be, and reaching a point of maturity to where you're more or less independent (it doesn't have to be financially, it could be independent in a lot of ways). It also takes a great level of maturity to be able to ask for help when you need it, and acknowledge that you need help. All in all, there are arguments that ring true for both sides, so it's definitely a combination.
ReplyDeleteI definitely agree that coming of age is affected by other people. I also think it's a social thing. As you move through school, you get "responsibilities" such as homework (time management, etc.), but you have an entire group of people with you, going through a lot of the same stuff -- so it isn't really that hard to adjust.
ReplyDeleteIn _Portrait_, it's interesting how little Stephen interacts with other people (outside of his imagination) up to chapter four. The epiphany or whatever really changes Stephen's accessibility, and I think it'll be interesting to see if there's any acceleration in development because of Stephen questioning his ideas, etc. So far, it doesn't seem like that's the case. Stephen just assumes that other people will want to hear his ideas without really challenging them, or else he kind of blows them off.
Yeah I totally agree. The people around you and your interactions with them play a big role in your coa. For this reason I think it is easier for those around you to notice your coa as they can observe how you act and mature in their interactions with you. I think this is also why it is easier to see your coa looking back. When you are in the moment you probably can't tell that you are acting differently, but looking back it is much clearer.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you. Other people heavily shape how we come of age. I think people are defined heavily by who they are not (in addition to who they are). I think we often try to be unlike certain people, and by doing so, those people actually influence how we come of age. For example, Stephen tries to separate himself from the group as much as possible, and while trying to differ from others, he creates a certain coming-of-age path for himself.
ReplyDeleteI believe that coming of age is mainly an inner development.. But i also agree that your relationship with others can help you develop yourself. I also think that you won't be able to to tell how your relationship with others will affect your coa until you reflect on your time with them. I like this post and it gives me new/different ideas about coa
ReplyDeleteI've always thought that coming of age would be more of a solely individual emerging identity, and the idea that we don't fully realize that we've "come of age" until we begin to look back. I think the moment we look and realize "wow all of this makes sense, why it is that I enjoy doing this, why I'm the way I am" is when we've reached the "end" of our emergence as an individual. I guess I've just always thought of it as an individual, and that others simply pushed and pulled us, slowly shaping us without our realization, until it's all over.
ReplyDelete